Coalitions?

Sometimes it is very difficult to reach a certain goal in negotiations. It's not always a 1 on 1 issue, and more often we're found in situations, where there are 3 or more parties. This doesn't necessarily mean that this kind of problem will be found in business only. It is something very common. Preparing for a trip (where everyone has different view of where to go, transportation, where to eat etc.), group work in projects, politics.. It all is about coalitions and finding the best possible benefit for everyone involved.

From my point of view, one can find him- or herself in a less pleasant situation more often, than being in a coalition. Naturally, in theory, we should always strive to be in a coalition, as it will benefit us more, however, some people who are true individualists may find it difficult to form one. Being said that, this blog note is focused on a lack of coalition.

Negotiations are mostly done in a competitive style. That means, that coalitions start and collapse. Some people argue, some people don't. If it is a group work, how can we have a consensus, if everyone's fighting for his or her piece of a pie? You may want to stand outside of the coalition. 

As a good person, you should focus on the benefits for all, not for the unit's outcome. Probably the most important part of the negotiations are relationships. How can we have good relations, if we fight against each other?

Remember, if someone's trying to take advantage over you, he or she's trying to become a leader. It is normal and there's nothing wrong with that, except that overall you lose. Don't let anyone get your pie. Have in mind that you can always leave, because you have a BATNA, don't you?

The coalition always provides a risk of a lack of trust. While we care about relationship, how can we not trust each other? It takes us nowhere and is some kind of a dead end.

Focus on all the disagreements quickly and correct bad communication. Be a moral leader - don't fight for the outcome, as it will lead the negotiations to a bad point. Talk about the potential benefits and try to split the outcome equally. Remember, do not focus on present, rather future. 

And last, but not least, don't try to fool people, there will be the time, when they will see all the inequalities, so prevent them.

Taking care of relationships may be a very difficult task. In most cases people are greedy, and even if they seem to be trustworthy, in negotiations they become aggressors. Don't let your nature lead you to the disaster.