Newtown schools negotiations

Well, so my thoughts today are pretty simple. 

Being a foreigner puts you in a especially unpleasing position, as you'll be forced to think twice as much. No, a man can't just study other languages, he must master them. That's the hard truth about communication. You probably won't be able to win negotiations with the expected result if you don't have enough lingual skills! Second is the fear. Do you fear? That might not be clever to say "no, I don't". Being on teacher's association side we were afraid of losing our jobs. We were responsible for others' jobs too. Are you brave enough to battle your supervisors? Are you law-conscious enough to fight your weak position? Unless you are a lawyer, I doubt it. So basically this week's negotiations taught me three basic things: 

1. You lose, if you aren't as fluent to communicate as others are (it doesn't matter if you are a foreigner or not, you must know many psychological tricks, right?) 

2. You lose, if you aren't sure of your position, and you don't have enough power to counter-attack. 

3. You lose if you don't know the law.

'Final Offer' Documentary

An image is worth than thousands of words

This week we watched a documentary titled "Final Offer", from 1985. The movie was about US-Canadian General Motors company, and UAW. The main character, Bob White, who was the head of Canadian Union, was fighting for the workers to get them the deal, they deserved. Living under high pressure, he didn't stop his fight, and with a great will, he showed his opponents how strong a man can be.

While I'm not going to spoil the plot, I give you the direct link to the movie on YouTube, where you can watch the entire documentary.

Watching this I was impressed how unexpected negotiations can be. How important are coalitions, and how easily they can be broken. The conclusion I see is that the most important part of negotiations is information. This, and the stubbornness of the negotiator, his or her posture, ability to form coalitions without other parties knowing it, the team that a negotiator has to have... Without them I cannot imagine anyone trying to get any deal in these difficult times.

On the other hand, this documentary shows how much power unions have. One phone call can change everything. One phone call can destroy a man. 

Working as a negotiator, you must prepare yourself to live in very dangerous environment. Don't fool yourself that no one ever will try to harm you. Psychologically. How strong mentally you are defines how well you negotiate.

As a beginner negotiator I see how big potential sociology, psychology and self-development have. A person cannot learn the theory only. A person must encourage him- or herself to live under pressure. If a negotiator cannot manage it, then it's not his world.

Moral leadership

Democracy is the power of equal votes for unequal minds.

- Charles I of England 

As there are many departments in companies that are aiming for some particular aspects, like: finance, sales, technology, research and development, their goal, in theory, is to cooperate to create a greater value for the company. However, there might be many situations where departments may fight each other.

As a good negotiator you should foresee them and implement a democracy into your business.

Although business may seem to be an autocratic environment, where specialists are leading, showing all their knowledge and using it to create strategies, and achieve certain personal goals, there might be no sense to fight for outcome not in the name of a company.

Yes, in general, we are more interested in the results that will affect us positively short-term: we want higher wages, less work time, we want to be seen as an intelligent and wise person, lead, put our own ideas into life, and show others that we have more power. In fact, by doing this we can make our company collapse and lose all the prosperity in the more distant future.

As a beginner negotiator, what I have developed so far are the 5 rules that a moral leader should follow in order to create a peaceful and thoughtful atmosphere in all the negotiations, no matter the topic and value of them. 

Coalitions?

Sometimes it is very difficult to reach a certain goal in negotiations. It's not always a 1 on 1 issue, and more often we're found in situations, where there are 3 or more parties. This doesn't necessarily mean that this kind of problem will be found in business only. It is something very common. Preparing for a trip (where everyone has different view of where to go, transportation, where to eat etc.), group work in projects, politics.. It all is about coalitions and finding the best possible benefit for everyone involved.

Dealing with Liars

"Lying is not exceptional; it is normal, and more often spontaneous and unconcious than cynical and coldly analytical. Our minds and bodies secrete deceit." 

- D. L. Smith, 

Why We Lie: The Evolutionary Roots of Deception and the Unconscious Mind 

Although it is illegal and mostly unethical when bargaining, many people do this. It doesn't necessarily mean giving the wrong, completely misleading information. Puffing, bluffing, partially true statements; it all is a lie. The thing is - we almost don't care about that.

As Charles B. Craver says, negotiator may lie without being dishonest. This is called "misrepresenting" - the "ability" we are almost born with. It is a kind of behavior that starts early - typically at age three or four. 

Studies prove that the older we are, the better liars we become. In fact, our bodies and minds are prepared for that, which explains that it's easier to lie than to detect the lie. 

But what's the point? Does it mean we should or shouldn't lie (or misrepresent the information)?